How Emotion Coaching Can Foster Resilience In Young People.

As a parent, it can be challenging to help your child navigate their emotions. From temper tantrums to social anxieties, there are many different situations that can trigger strong emotional responses in young people and kids. However, there is a positive parenting approach that can help you create a nurturing environment that fosters your child's emotional development and helps them build resilience: emotion coaching.

What is Emotion Coaching?

Emotion coaching is a positive parenting approach developed by John Gottman, a world-renowned expert in the field of relationship science. It involves recognising and validating your child's emotions, communicating understanding and empathy, and helping them to manage their emotions effectively.

In emotion coaching, parents use five core steps to help their children navigate their emotions:

1. Be aware of your child's emotions: Recognise your child's emotional responses and acknowledge them.

2. Connect with your child: Build a strong emotional connection with your child, so they feel comfortable sharing their feelings with you.

3. Listen and validate your child's emotions: Listen to your child's perspective and validate their emotions, rather than dismissing or minimising them.

4. Help your child label emotions: Help your child label their emotions accurately, so they can better understand what they are feeling.

5. Teach your child to manage emotions: Teach your child to manage their emotions in positive ways, such as taking deep breaths or engaging in physical activity.

How Emotion Coaching Can Help Your Child

Emotion coaching can have many benefits, including:

1. Improved emotional regulation: By teaching your child to manage their emotions effectively, they will learn how to regulate their feelings in a healthy and positive way.

2. Increased self-awareness: When you help your child label their emotions, they become more aware of their feelings and can better understand how to manage them.

3. Greater empathy: By modeling empathy and understanding, you can help your child develop greater empathy towards others.

4. Improved communication: Emotion coaching involves active listening and validation, which can help improve communication between parents and children.

5. Enhanced resilience: By learning to manage their emotions effectively, children become more resilient and better able to cope with life's challenges.

   While emotion coaching can be an effective tool for promoting emotional development and resilience in children, it may not come naturally to all parents. Especially if we haven’t been taught how ourselves, we might struggle with our own emotional regulation or have difficulty connecting on an emotional level. In such cases, seeking the support of a professional counsellor can be beneficial.

   Counselling or parent coaching can provide parents with a safe and supportive environment to explore their emotions and learn new skills for managing them. A trained counsellor can help parents identify their own emotional triggers and develop strategies for regulating their own emotions, so they are better equipped to respond to their kid's emotional needs.

   Parent coaching can provide parents with guidance and support in developing a more positive and nurturing relationship with their child. They can help parents identify their child's emotional needs and develop practical strategies for responding to them in a supportive and constructive way.

   For children, counselling can provide a safe space to explore their emotions and develop skills for managing them effectively. A trained therapist can help children identify and label their emotions, develop strategies for regulating their feelings, and build self-awareness and resilience.